Mental health
We had a guest speaker at work today….speaking to us about mental health. His name is Geoff McDonald and he is an ex-VP at Unilever. This wasn’t the first talk I heard this week about mental health. The second I listened to was by Gitte Klitgard at Craft-Conf. (Yes, I am talking about Craft Conf again :)) She is an external agile coach but she talks a lot about how we need to be in-tune with our emotions especially in our teams.
Both Gitte’s and Geoff’s talks moved me to tears. I felt a silent scream brewing inside me during this time.
I have had an almost shit week at work. I am dreading walking into the building tomorrow. If someone asked me to articulate why it was shit, I will struggle to find the right words. One reason is definitely the lack of drive I am seeing around me. (I wrote about this in an earlier post this week.) I also think it’s the idea that everyone just wants me to provide answers or solutions to their asks without them doing a self-analysis of whether they are actually being fair. I have also had to make the decision of going into mediation which I have found is going to be emotionally exhausting. I have also heard a lot of loud discussions turn into unnecessary arguments around where I sit. For those who know me, I avoid conflict. I also don’t like to see my colleagues be in a state of conflict and do nothing about it. I don’t like to use strong language in my interactions at work. Conversations need to be friendly but should continue to send the message across about expectations. This is how I operate.
Work places should be happy places. We spend at-least 40 hours a week in an office. It is necessary that they are a place you look forward to every day. It needs to be a place where you can be your true self. I always say, if you get up in the morning and that office is the last place you want to be…it’s time to take action. I only say this because you need to take care of yourself FIRST. If you are emotionally drained, you cannot perform. You are letting your peers down. You will feel upset most of the time. You will not want to engage. And then one day WILL come when you WILL CRASH. Please don’t allow this to happen to you.
Both Gitte and Geoff and shared their personal stories about how they crashed. And how they realised we need to do something about ensuring mental stability of our colleagues. They couldn’t cope anymore because they took too much onto themselves.
Working with people is hard. It’s harder than any technical solution I have ever worked on in the past 12 years.
This week I have taken on a much bigger step in trying to keep everyone I work with happy. I am also making advances to fix broken relationships. All this is emotionally exhausting. But I knew exactly what I had to do when I felt this.
- Speak to someone you trust the most. Both at work and at home.
- Do some mindful activity. I did some craft today.
- Write. Hence, this post.
- Refocus. Rekindle your sense of purpose. I started work on a workshop I am conducting for my group next week.
- Rest. I am going to sleep latest by 11:30 pm today.
Tomorrow will be a new day!
Maryam Umar 